to know is simply enough...

"Teach us, Good Lord, to serve Thee as Thou deservest; to give and not to count the cost; to fight and not to heed the wounds; to toil and not to seek for rest; to labor and not to ask for any reward save that of knowing that we do Thy will. Through Jesus Christ our Lord." ~St. Ignatius

I'm thankful for this rock that I call my anchor. Where peace is found that surpasses all understanding. Where His will is safe and the deepest most loving place to be.

Joy explainable.
Abundant flowing.
Stronger than death.

You have the sweetest name.
You are my soul's refrain.
I worship You.
I worship the name of the Lord.

And, because little boys who have a daddy who points them to His Will is the best kind of daddy to have.

9 school days later...

The first day of school consisted of breakfast eaten and chores (we do those first before diving in for the day) being done in record time. Everyone was just a little bit (VERY) excited. I'll admit this year found me digging my heels in a little deeper and longer, holding onto summer all that I could. 

If it weren't for their constant reminders of, "Mom, we start on Monday right?" "Mom, tomorrow I can't WAIT for school!" "Mom, we do school TODAY!", I may have kept putting that start date continually off. I really do love homeschooling. I just also found myself in the thick of reality that summer was over and wondering where did it go?!

I still find myself calling the day 'done' just to soak up the lingering days of warmth and sunshine. Now that it's been a good week and we've worked through what each day will look like (some even twice now), I'm happy to say I'm on board for another year (phew!) and have been transitioning more easily into what this change actually looks like. I like what it's producing: a lot more structure and purpose to our days. Cooler nights and cool mornings only signify my favorite season really is on its way. This is good stuff to put our hands and might and best to, for the Lord. Nothing and no one else.

We have a general flow to these days, following more our natural rhythms and cycles. I have a general idea of specifics that need to happen. I don't watch the clock unless we have an outside appointment (RARE). Things get done. I made a list for Asher, in no particular order for his independent subjects like reading, penmanship, math, piano, and typing to be done (with things to change on Fridays once Friday school starts up), to help aid in more self governing as well as brightened up the updated chore chart we've been using since about mid-summer. It got chewed on a bit by a cute little toddler. It provides the kids with all their daily morning chores (brunt of chores) as well as one 'extra chore' each morning, depending on the day. I was finding there was just more I needed help with around here! I'm thankful for willing helpers who don't bat an eye when I 'add' something more. Some even request them!

I haven't entered the need (yet) for an afternoon/evening list of some sort. For some reason they have those down pat and don't need any reminders or hints/help. I myself actually prefer that style of working so I am happy to lose the lists when and where I can. I definitely see the need for a time or season for them and so, am happy to implement them when and where needed to serve us/me. This friend recently shared here and here about what works best for her and her family. She shares a lot of the same philosophy concerning homeschooling, organizing/delegating, and most importantly that a one size does not fit all. I've gotten many great ideas and nuggets from her as well as other seasoned moms I know. Read what she wrote because I feel like I'd just be echoing a lot of what she shared. 

One rule I have with our chore chart is when (after a season of daily work and practice doing designated chores) someone  thinks they are all done, they may only then go 'check' to see if indeed they remembered them all and are ready to tell me they are finished (that's when I may or may not go around to check in on some of these chores to see if they have been done correctly which is always good to do from time to time). They have the chance to attend to the one or two they missed or if completed come and tell me they are done and ready to have work 'assessed', which I don't usually do now that they are all up to speed with the how and what's expected. It's more the time to then build up and reward for diligence, good attitude, and work done completely.

The goal is they should have all, if not most, done when they go to 'check' at the end. They aren't to ask me continually what is next (that's what looking at the chart on their own and learning it for a season is for) but on the flip side I also don't want them running to the chart each time to see what to do after completing just one, when I think and know it's high time they can remember more on their own. I was finding them too dependent on the chart (to the point of annoying), WAY back when, so this rule of thumb satisfies my desire for self sufficient and independent (even from a list) workers. 

Highlights for all just a week and a half in? 

*The electric pencil sharpener. Just wow!

*The beautiful caterpillar we found that has since formed a cocoon and sits in a bucket on our island. It could be a long winter waiting for this guy.

*Still being able to send Asher (with book works to accomplish) with Gabe to work, just to be with him.

*Teaching Textbooks for Asher's math. He loves it is an understatement. I have to limit his lessons to 2 or 3 a day. We may or may not already be on disc two, for those of you who know what I mean.

*Sophia learning to read at a more rapid rate and asking to read all the time. Up in her bed. Throughout the day. Asking to do penmanship up in bed too, at 9:30 p.m. 

*Devotions after breakfast and chores that really has evolved into so much more over the years. Our core things (most important things in my book) get done, which specific to this year has everything to do with 'hiding away in your heart' the truths of God. Scripture and hymns is about as simple and basic as it gets, but I want my children to be filled with those truths from sun-up until sun-down. Expanding our hymn library and even sharing with them some of my favorites has been a springboard for some really special gatherings loaded with those very truths. Ways to worship through song and work are heavy on my heart for this school year as well. There is nothing sweeter than hearing the hymns I am teaching them being poured out from a heart, down on hands and knees scrubbing...the toilet. I know it's touching His heart in return. I'm using this book more as a 'guide' or 'starter' for wherever the Holy Spirit leads us. The entire summer looked very similar to this, though I had no book incorporated. Just the good ole internet when needed!

From it also stems Asher's spelling, vocabulary, and copy work with the flexibility to add history and literature as I see fit since we do do another literature based program for history. We squeeze in our Little House on the Prairie series we're still working through (finishing up The Long Winter just yesterday morning and anticipating Almanzo coming to call! in the next; Little Town on the Prairie), as well as talk about chores done in the morning and stars as earned for a later reward. It's a building, sharing, teaching, praying, worshiping, learning, getting on the 'right kind of track' way to start the day before diving more heavily in. It's refreshing to my soul and helps me breathe just a little bit easier. I really really love it!

This EAGER student and workhorse keeps me calling for the breaks and deciding when we're 'DONE!' His first day was so precious to me. So determined. So ready. So not ready! Lots of shaping going on here. Fun and funny. Free spirited. Doesn't easily back down. That's a full package right there folks!

Working through the 'kinks'? The first day really was high and low and up and down and exhausting for me when it was all said and done. I flopped on the couch in the late afternoon to hear "Teacher, Teacher!" being played upstairs. It made me smile and realize, all was not in vain. 

Choc chips and maple syrup. Anyone?

Really?! I have boys who just do this? How sweet!

Sour apple season in full bloom.

Sharpening made fun!

Hard to spot, but literally dead center in the picture. 

School/life right around me.

Typing Club.

The perfect little distraction.

Mom needs a break. Time for a walk!

Shadow jumping.

Working side by side with my babe. He was actually home to do some things. What a treat! I like working with and being with my man.

last days of summer

Summer seemed ever so fleeting this time around. More so than usual. Life is busier than ever around these part. Opening a new store (with business partner and friend) and taking new ground (just exciting!) in the next town over definitely played a major part in the last many weeks looking much like a blur and whirlwind. But life is fleeting on it's own! How very rewarding to have something to show so soon for all this hard work. The kids love the Canton Bagelry best. Their hard work (Asher spent most long days with Gabe doing the not-so-pretty-type work) and sacrificial time given on their part has been matched with the fruit of their little labors. 

This little harvest (the one here home with me) continues to grow and ripen for the some day picking. Now more than ever I see just how much home is needed. We started school (another post with pics I'm sure) and I am freshly reminded of how thankful I am to have the freedom and God given right and calling to be the one to shape and influence. Nobody has their hearts or best interest in mind more than the One who formed their very threads. We are humbled to be the ones (the next who care the most) to tag team with Him to draw out exactly what it is He put in them for His glory. 

These years. So fleeting. So influential. So foundation laying and character building. I'm just beyond words that Gabe and I get to do this ourselves. No tears shed here for sending off and away. We dove right back into life, making memories, and walking out this sanctification process, bearing with and carrying one another, together. It's a beautiful thing! And by His grace we really really love it.

End of summer days...

Helper/observer.

Summer fresh, I will miss you!

He is my baby, right now, after all!

Boys. 4 boys. And I love every single one of them. So different. So unique. I just love it!

In process, before the Bagelry was pretty.

And this guy who worked around the clock to ensure it passed food service/health code specifications. Not for the faint-hearted! He really is amazing. Throughout the whole process I was painstakingly made aware of just how thankful I am to call him, mine. You think you know someone, and in your heart you know you really do, yet nothing cements those feelings more than seeing that person deliver in a tangible every day kind of way. I was asked several times by different on-lookers if Gabe got grumpy from working such long hours. No. He is a pillar of consistency in all the right ways.

This pool's second little impromptu, yet just as special, baptism of the summer.

So many deleted pictures (much like this one) I would text to Gabe on my way to him making sure is this what you need/want from home?!

And lastly, just a simple dress that she certainly does dress up, now doesn't she?!

our garden of life...

It's a time for putting our hands to the plow, I tell myself. It's a season for lots of sowing, I tell the kids. Then they look at me confused and we sit and I explain, again. Liam prays this morning and thanks God for the tiny little seeds that will grow into plants that will be big and beautiful. We're 'go-go-going' from sun up until sun down, but the waiting with expectancy, faith, and hope is something that runs deeper with each passing day. It just has to or else we'd all go crazy here.

We go about our days, perseverance the name of the banner we wave, marked of course by the need to stop, redirect, remember, look past the here and now (at times and many times throughout the day or just hour!), and simply say out loud P-E-R-S-E-V-E-R-A-N-C-E. When I remember I have a Helper to do exactly what I need to do in the exact moment I am feeling the most inept, the most inadequate for the calling before me, the air really does become so much easier to breath. Those times remain marked by His grace and strength that I had nothing to do with but stand there and walk in a power not my own. He is a living God, you know. In the moment. Right there. He even allowed that moment because He has everything I need to withstand and walk in victory. You do too. He always provides the scapegoat. Look for it.

In the meantime, life around these parts thrives. I continually stand amazed and thankful for His faithfulness in that regard, to me, who sometimes wonders if I'm hitting all the marks 'I' think we should be hitting. I haven't attempted the beach by myself with just the kids (maybe in heaven I will actually be able to do that!). I have, so far, taught NO ONE to successfully swim in our 36 inch pool. I still have elastic from 6 months ago that I got to make Sophia something in the line of a dress or skirt. I haven't done this or that, but at the end of the day His agenda is really the only agenda I want to be implementing. Rather than just, are we happy? Or what did I/we accomplish today?... Are we growing? And are we being stretched and learning from the marks? I want to stop and see His imprint on our very lives, not have it pass me by.

I see grace given to my children and I'm thankful. They carry a lot in their hearts and prayers too, for this very season, and echo now my biggest prayer of all for these 'seeds' we're burying deep down into the cool of the earth... that they'd  love Jesus all the days of their lives. Starting with, today. Because all of these 'todays' add up to a lifetime of walking with Him, wherever He calls, wherever He leads. 

Summer is coming to a fast close. The lawn needs a desperate mow. Sophia sneaks in some time in her new work books here and there though we haven't officially started much of ANYTHING in the line of home school. Asher worked from sun up until 10 o'clock last night with Gabe. He loves every minute of it. Gabe does too. He needs to just be with his daddy. What a good daddy to do just that, and to pass on how to be a man. One of integrity, one of excellence, one who loves Jesus. I am proud of my men.

I also can't help but find myself wandering through my day gripped with the recent outbreak of so much pain and suffering. Though nothing new, it is our world's reality. So much hurt. So much need. I am quick to remember I was once just as dead in my trespasses as those inflicting such suffering. God is a just God, but He is also a forgiving God and I know He is after all those hearts to repent and change and find who they really are in Him. The bondage those souls are in. My heart is gripped for them as well. His blood was shed for us all.

But I will not feel just helpless as I lift up prayers and shed tears that ache from the inside out for those crying out. Their cries are not unheard. And my faith filled prayers can change and impact the course I am watching unfold from afar. I love how God is meeting them right where they are. He is a near God.

It's times like these that confirm in my heart, again (and even solidifies the direction I felt lead to take with our upcoming homeschooling year months ago)... Hide in our hearts the promises, truths, and WORD of God. Psalms, hymns, scripture passages. Teach them to my children. What if they take all our Bibles? And times get really hard and bad for us? It needs to be on the inside so I can preach the gospel to others and even myself in desperate times of suffering, pain, and persecution that I even wonder when we will find ourselves in. Put on the whole armor of God, know your enemy, and walk in victory.

Never has there been nor will there be a name, a person, so controversial as Jesus Christ. 

Did you ever stop to really wonder why? 

Because He was and is exactly who He said He is. Not sure who that is. Read about Him and what His kingdom is. It is not an earthly one. It is the only one worth living for. His dominion is an everlasting dominion that will not pass away, and His kingdom is one that will never be destroyed. He waits with life for you.

Kings and kingdoms will all pass away, but there's something about that name.

I am so so thankful for that name. 

lemuel

The only place I know he's truly accounted for and not getting into something, which at this point means ANYTHING and EVERYTHING!

His, "You really think I'm going to sit here and look at these books, Mom?!" face.

"No" to the wipes container.

Having a mischievous one year old and four other children to keep tabs on is as good a time as any to 'expand' the gardens, right!? And while I have nothing to put IN the new space, (reserved for flowering perennials since I can now with MUCH more sun exposure, see?!) at least it's ready, right!? It has been a fun project while it lasts. Just have to go where the motivation leads me in this season of life. I'm sure another day it will be purge/organize the closets which isn't nearly as much fun, in my book.

Kept him busy, but of course, not long enough!

While I do have designated cabinets for the 'toddlers' that serve as storage AND safe crazy (though 'messy') fun entertainment (note: diaper picture above), this guy has taken it to a whole new level! I wonder how much of that really has to do with my inability to keep tabs on multiple things and human beings at once. EVERY cabinet and drawer is now up for grabs. And while I don't think he's any more busy than any of my others at this age, I do think he's simply this: 'number five baby'! Clearly...and cute as ever. 

Older siblings remain smitten. He takes awesome 'naps' day AND night. He's learning and discovering and taking it all in. No. Come. (I'm training a puppy.) This reward, eternal. Sway back. Bowed legs. The waddle makes my heart burst. He's ours and he's something awfully special.